Emotional vulnerability equates courage

Vulnerability equates courage? For many this is very difficult to comprehend. How can putting myself out there in the open - susceptible to emotional hurt - be a moment of courage for me? My thoughts, words and actions all naturally work towards ensuring that my vulnerabilities are least exposed. So I posture such that I am perceived to be someone with no chinks in my emotional set-up. It’s a defence mechanism which for many, come as natural as breathing.

In fact, many of us would equate emotional vulnerability with weakness. I would not like to put myself open to ridicule, pain and hurt. When I expose my vulnerability, what would others think of me? I would rather go without than open myself to scrutiny. Little do I realise however, that covering up or posturing, just feeds the feeling of vulnerability. And then the next time I feel vulnerable, it manifests itself even more within me. And so begins the vicious cycle, with little room for escape.

Yet there is hope for escape - By opening up and acknowledging my vulnerability. When I allow myself to reach out and confess, first of all to myself, that I am only human. When I decide to take that first baby step and test the ground, not knowing if my legs will support me or not; when I decide to take a chance & open out the window of my emotional framework to others- even if it is just a crack; that is when I take a chance on leaving myself open and vulnerable. This is an act of the greatest courage. Often what we perceive as a weakness, is truly courage and strength of the highest order. Just as a bean bag is often perceived to lack strength – it however provides an inner support in any which way.

It takes great courage to lay ones heart on the line in a relationship; it takes immense guts for a leader to admit that he/she too could make mistakes; it takes immense strength for a parent to be able to admit to a child that he/she may not be perfect and know everything. All it requires is a willingness to let go – to let go of self and allow myself to become vulnerable. In letting go, I realise that I drift into nothingness. And in that nothingness, lie my greatest strengths – for there is nothing to prove, nothing to protect myself from.

Does this willingness to be vulnerable come naturally? Not to me and to a million others like me.  It's a decision we take day after day after day. And with each iteration, it becomes just that little bit easier to open that window a wee bit more...to experience that strength, power and courage that comes with vulnerability.