Quarantine musings...

It's been about 3 months in a lockout from my home country, due to the pandemic. As I look back, I see so many near misses...if only's..and had they worked out, I would be in my home in my country at this moment, in quarantine - not in an airbnb in a country far away; I would be cooking for my family in my kitchen - not giving cooking classes to my son and dad through texts and videos. Last minute flight cancellations, missing the deadline of the last flight into India by 2 hours...sigh. If I continue in this vein, it's a difficult reality. Maybe, echoed in varied ways for others. 

So I've decided to turn my attention to some of my learnings at this time. 

1. The ties that bind are 'Human Connections' - be they virtual or in person. Virtual human connections have uplifted my spirits these past few months. Friends - new, old and long lost, family who've reached out just to... connect. And I've experienced that it's not blood the matters, but genuine human empathy to just say "hello, I'm thinking of you", "how are you doing today" or "what can I do to help". Powerful words. Also important, words said with genuineness and with no trace of self elevation. 

2. There are hidden potentials in everyone - if we only give them the chance to exhibit them and flower. Case in point - my 21 yr old offspring, who has surprisingly displayed a potential for cooking and cleaning. In my absence, of course! Which gave him the chance to exhibit them, without mother hen (yours truly) clucking around.

3. People, particularly children, rise up to do what the occasion demands of them. Caveat - If we are also willing to step back and let them, maybe with only gentle guidance, if at all required. Having a 'hands off' approach is a tough one for parents. The covid got my boy to change his bedding every 2 weeks, with no reminders from me apart from an initial answer to his question of how often it should be done. Mind you, this was task I couldn't get him to do for 21 years!

4. Most people have an inherent deep desire to be of use to another. But may not know how to. Tough to recognise this in others too. Be aware of this however - Greater may be our need to be of use than to step back and give others the opportunity to be of use. 

5. Having said that, the greater challenge may lie in our hesitancy in asking for/ accepting help. At times I feel that receiving graciously is an art - inherent in some, to be worked at in others. Receiving could be of help offered or even praise given. 

6. These circumstances are difficult and as far removed from the old normal for all of us. Mental health, a challenge at the best of times, is particularly more so now. Taking a moment to acknowledge this in ourselves, as well as in others is of essence. Once acknowledged, it's easier to let go/work with it. 

7. Some have an inherent ability to manage stress well. Being unable to manage stress well may result in tendencies to exhibit behaviour far removed from and at the other end of our old normal patterns. Recognising this in ones own behaviour patterns first and in others next, may well form the basis of our ease of being in these times. 

8. Going with the flow - easy to say, may be tougher to practice. The desire to be someplace else in an idealistic future is easy to have. Tougher may be the ability to let go of that fantasy and go in the flow of the moment. As Richard Rohr says in "Breathing under water" - the more you resist, the more it persists. A quote familiar to many of us who've done NLP, Vipasanna. I'm learning finer nuances to it at this time. 

9. Be prepared for the unexpected - always. The challenge is to get comfortable with it. Old wine in new bottles. Old relationships seen in a new light, may throw up the unexpected. Every moment is new. New ways of living. And the beauty is that we only need to look deep inside ourselves to be able to thrive in the unexpected. New inherent resources to deal with the unexpected evolve if we but give space to them to emerge. 

10. This too will pass. As we learn in vipassana, everything is impermanent. From one breath to the next, an inhale to an exhale. 

A new normal. A new balance to find. Each moment, every moment. May each of us find our new balance, moment to moment. 

Ruminations of a quarantined mind

It's been a month since I've been in a country far away from my own, in a lockdown period necessitated by covid 19. A month of highs and lows, certainties and uncertainties, joys and angst. As I reflect on the workings of my mind and body this past month, a few reflections come to mind. 

1. The body is in quarantine. And it's good and necessary at this time. For the most part, I think people believe in the necessity of quarantining ourselves for our own good health. My thought : how often do we quarantine our minds? Quarantine aka 'a state of isolation'. Away from the hustle and bustle of talk, other talk and self talk. To concentrate on just being....rejuvenation.

2. Some minds tend to be in a perpetual state of anxiety. It thrives on anxiety. Feeds on worry. In the absence of anything else to do, it chews the cud. With self and with others. Paranoia in some cases. In normal course of events, life happens and much of this may be camouflaged, swept under the carpet, attention diverted. But during a forced quarantine,....true fears/emotions begin to emerge... nowhere to hide...at times. 

3. Some minds, on the other hand, prefer to play ostrich. Bury itself. Attempt any kind of diversionary tactics to avoid facing itself. Uncomfortable with reality, escapism prevails. Busy bodies and minds. If I don't acknowledge it, it doesn't exist. Bury it deep within... Not seen... Not heard... Not felt...Not acknowledged. Till, a tipping point is reached. And then boom... It may swing to the other end of the paradigm. 

4. Some minds, reach out to touch the inner being, and then quickly pull out. Like standing before a beautiful pool of water, dipping a toe in and quickly pulling out. Shallow immersions. Choosing instead to engross the mind in other 'more important - less painful' activities. 

5. Some minds on the other hand, face this isolation of the mind with equanimity. Even relish it at times. It's that time to dig deep, get past the fluff, get face to face with ourselves... and all its perfections and imperfections. To get to the hidden reserves of inner strength...communion with the deepest inner self/being... An Oasis in the dessert. (Communion - "the sharing or exchanging of intimate thoughts and feelings, especially when the exchange is on a mental or spiritual level."). Spirituality in it's deepest form. Be still and know... 

Question to each of us: do we take time off periodically to quarantine our minds? Are we comfortable facing our innermost selves? Without varnish, in it's deepest truest form? What hidden treasures do you think we might find this way?